Addressed to your future

Sometimes I wonder, when people did not like me, I always feel like I’m waiting for a person, when the first face of other people’s feelings, but I choose to avoid.  20 years, I have been waiting for that like themselves, and now, twenty years later, I’m waiting for the right people.Maybe there’s something we had to choose to bow.I was young at the moment, even in the eyes of many I was pedantic and uncivilized, so I still stubbornly doing the right thing they think, listen to your heart.  I used to always afraid to miss the love, and now I fear most is afraid to face their own heart, love someone or hate someone worth mentioning, these are not important, we believe, the past will always come.  Perhaps he was still angry, as I refused to look at him.But in fact, I saw his eyes a lot, did not tell him.Or he did not care, he just cares about us there together.Not all things will have results, believe that as long as the heart is like.  Maybe I have panic people like me leave, I am no longer afraid of being the last to leave, but afraid because I like people like me become a negative energy, in my opinion, no matter what kind of feelings, we should make it more strong and brave Yes.  He encouraged me to say a few words, but also in a bad mood when I say very childish aloof, like loneliness.He did not know it was not me.  I always believe that good, either he, or the future, I have always believed that, even if I do not have the ability to have as big, but my heart longing for the good and the beautiful, and now wish you were bald, so I already feel at ease.  I have also liked other people, who are desperate to put himself in the cage, because of lack of affection and decadent, I have been stubbornly believe that is what I want love, I want, I want to heart.But at the moment I can not think of his appearance completely, just remember he was wearing glasses, wearing clothes, shoulders single room package, and the phrase has let me hear a girl can not help but cry out to learn to be strong.  I have been exaggerating his role, then I do not know who he is, can do, I will do their own good and the bad laid on him, he thought it was the power of.I do not look forward to and past the intersection, but I believe the future will have a choice.  What can we do three years?Now I am convinced that one day three years later, I met you, even three years later I still have not met, then I will wait another three years.I’m not afraid of a long time, I’m afraid we can not meet.I do not live to finish died after living only for peace of mind, because I believe.  I do not believe in deities before, now I too do not believe, but I believe life one day time will enable us to meet the people met, forget some of the less important fragments, life would have been ahead.  A lot of people say I’m negative, sometimes they would feel if I said that three years ago, I would be sure to say that he really is a dead person, every day is blind, do not know what is happiness, apart from relying on What people no longer look forward to, ah, etc., etc. every day, just like a ridiculous waiting who are looking forward to every day, but do not know where to happiness, are angry every day, but do not know what angry.  Sometimes I ask to meet that person, how long, how long have to love a person, and my heart that they will give the answer, do not take long, just like the opportunity to meet the man.  I always think of death, I often cry because of death, sometimes for himself, sometimes for the family, sometimes will cry, why shed tears could not say.  I know quite a few people, some seen, some never seen, and I still pledge allegiance to them and I believe there is still beauty in the world, everyone’s heart is lonely, and sometimes do not meet, but will make the heart more near.  Pei said I always refused wonderful, can not believe in the future, not willing to accept, no matter how he said, I will not say anything, I believe he will understand one day, one day he will find that the decision of the.Three years can really change a lot, I can not let him blindly wait, maybe I decided to choose the best moment to tell him that the worst outcome, I could do.  I used to always compare secretly hope I am better than everyone so little, that I’m not beautiful, nor understanding, I do not understand anything, very stubborn, but blindly want to do the best, and now I choose to do the most real people, without departing from the heart, not far from friends.  Sister, now three years old, but more and more childish, because some of my truth and angry, I guess this is my way of expression there is a problem, maybe I can not let her accept on communicating, even if well-intentioned, will unnecessary misunderstanding, I am more convinced Song teacher, honesty is the most critical, but you how to express your honesty, is a problem.  I cherish all the things around, inarticulate I just want to try to let them know that in fact everyone is very important in my life, sometimes I feel powerless, but I try.  I think, then I believe that the future, in addition to part of my fantasy, even more important is that you, no matter how long I will meet or find you, I have reason to believe.Now everything is for me a better place, one day when I stand before you, so that you can smile.  I’m in the moment, do not imagine you look like, not to think about the future of the scene, I felt a very warm place.You are my faith, even if I can not see you now.    August 5, 2015 overcast